Fingers crossed, things are going well!

We are five days in as a forever family and things are looking pretty good.  During this process you are prepared for the worst and our experiences couldn't be any further from that. I sometimes feel like the gloating dad, and maybe I am, but we both feel so lucky that our journey is going the way it is.

Yesterday Little One met some of her cousins, well actually they are mine cousins and their kids but you know what I mean.  They were all so excited to meet Little One and thank fully they weren't disappointed.  It was a little slow at first, after all there were a lot of them, but before too long Little One was charming the grown ups and playing with the young ones.  It seems that new family links have been made, just as I was hoping.
We also had a visit from some of the young boys from the Mews that we live in.  Little One was instantly taken with the boys and much more so than any of the other young kids she'd met.

Today we had a snow day with more kids from the Mews.  It started with sledging in the park (Little One didn't really take to it) and then along with the boys we built a small (and slightly pathetic) snowman.  Little One loved gathering the snow.  The boys then spent some time with us whilst their mother was out.  Little One loved taking charge and bossing the boys around.

After her action packed day Little One kicked up the usual fuss come bed time.  But tonight, as last night, it was minimal tears before bed.  The major difference was that in the lead up, and as the tears began, she called out for her foster father.  We both knew it was going happen.  In truth we had expected it much sooner but it still takes the wind out of you when you hear her utter those words.  Hopefully it's just part of her process and tomorrow our bonding journey will continue.

Is this the calm before the storm?

Little one has now spent two nights with us.  Both nights were fraught with tears come bedtime.  Last night was worse than the night before, 40 minutes of throat-scratching, ear-shattering, choking-inducing screaming.  But, finally, she drifted off.  Despite the drama getting to bed, Little One slept through the night both nights and we actually had to go in a wake her up at 8.30am each morning otherwise she would have slept longer.  That has got to be a good sign, hasn't it??

Little One and daddy are now registered at the same doctor as me.  We had the usual, people looking at the three of us and wondering who's who and what's what.

We've been meeting more friends and neighbours (with loads more waiting their turn) and Little One seems to be coping really well.  We haven't had any tantrums, other than bedtime, and no crying for her foster family.  When you go through the adoption process you hear so many horror stories about what to expect, thankfully we have not experienced any of this, not yet anyway.  If it does come our way we are prepared but if not, happy days.

It's very cold and snowing outside so we're limited to some of the activities we can get up to, although we have sampled the local library and softplay centre.  At the moment we are having fun, learning more about Little One's little quirks and bad habits. We've had some right belly laughs watching her.  I can't wait for us to all grow together.

Little One is home!

At long long last our little one is home.  I can't tell you how happy and relieved we both are although this morning the emotions were very different.

Poor Little One's foster carers were so upset and despite their best efforts to hide it it was plan to see.  Daddy and I were both totally choked up.  It was impossible to revel in the fact that Little One was coming home when it is evident how much it hurts someone else but the reality of it is that everyone know this was coming.  We will always be grateful for what they have done and Little One will never forget them.

On the way home we stopped off at the Sainsbury's and had a hilarious moment.  Little One, who by the way is very vocal, was to be heard calling both of us Daddy.  The woman on the till looked at both of us and then at Little One before giving us that confused looked that I am assuming we will be getting a lot in the future.  It made us both giggle.

We had another good day today.  No real issues but we are going to have to work on the old potty training. A couple of wet pull-ups were had today but then again it is only to be expected that we might take a few steps backwards.

Bedtime on the other hand was another story!!  Poor Little One tried all the tricks to avoid going to bed but Dad power was the champion in that war.  The battle consisted of 15 minutes of screaming and bawling but in the end she drifted off.  Let's just hope she sleeps through the night.  Tomorrow could be a totally different kind of day.  We're expecting her to ask when she is going home or where her foster carers are but we are ready to face whatever the day brings.

First official job tomorrow, registering at the doctor's surgery!!!!

Introductions - Day 9

At long last we are at the end of introductions!!! Hoorah!!!

There was nothing spectacular that happened today, it was just a normal family day.  Or at least it felt very normal.  We had the odd tantrum and even a few tears when we said that Little One had to take off her prized Hello Kitty wellington boots.  But that is all normal, isn't it!

The drive back to the foster careers home seemed such a long drive with Little One in the back of the car insisting that she wanted to 'stay at daddies house'.

It was a bit emotional at the foster careers home as they had been packing all Little One's belongings.  Having already taken all her toys yesterday, we took all her clothes this evening.  Her room looks so bizarre with all her bits in there.  So bizarre, but so cool.

So tomorrow is the big day.  Little One is coming home....FOR GOOD!

Introductions - Day 8

So we were hoping that Little One would be able to come home tomorrow but alas it is not to be and we will have proceed with tomorrow as the last day of introductions.  It's a bit of a pain in the butt but it's only on more day and we're still both super excited!

Another good day was had today.  After the disappointment of being told we had an extra day to wait we decided to make the most of it and after a hearty lunch we headed to the local soft play area.  Little One made a new friend and they played together in the plastic balls and up and down the ladders and slides.  Daddy and I and her friend's mother all joined in.  Her friend's mother seemed totally unfazed that Little One was calling us both daddy.  It all seemed so natural and fun.  I'm sure we'll come up against some ignorance at some point in the future but it's so nice to think that there are people you don't know who don't care if you aren't the same as them, just as long as you they can see how much you love your child.

Little One meet another neighbour today and got more presents.  Lucky little princess!

When we finally took Little One home she was quite tired (as were we!!!).  We got her ready for bed and tucked her in.  Unfortunately this was not as dreamy an experience as our last bedtime routine.  Little One cried and cried and cried and her foster dad had to let her stay up a little longer.  I sure it didn't help that she would have seen all of her toys boxed up and ready to come home with me and Daddy.  I'm pretty sure the next couple of days are going to be so hard for her but we will be here supporting her, and loving her every step of the way.

Introductions - Day 7

Today has left us both feeling so empty.  I don't think either one of us would have imagined that a day away from Little One would have been so hard.

We had planned so spend our 'last free day' doing lots of stuff and enjoying the silence, but somehow the silence just doesn't seem the same anymore.  All our thoughts are on what Little One is up to today and wondering if she is missing us.  Just two more days of introductions and then, on Wednesday, Little One will be home for good.

Introductions - Day 6

Little One arrived at 10 this morning along with her foster parents and their children.  The kids were so keen to see our dog and they weren't disappointed.  Apparently that was all they spoke about all the way home.  The foster family stayed for about 45 minutes and all was well until they left.  When the door closed Little One burst into tears, the first real tears we have ever seen from Little One.  Luckily Little One is a tough cookie and within a few minutes cuddles from Dad had pacified her.  From them on it was business as usual.

After lunch we headed off to the park.  This was the first time that Little One had been out walking with the dog.  For all the worries we had they are getting on fine.  A little bit more bonding needed but that will come with time.

Little One met lost for our neighbours today and got a few presents.  They all loved her.  And why wouldn't they?  She is gorgeous specimen, we are so proud to be her parents.

We spent the remainder of the day just being a family.  It was all so normal and natural that we almost forget we had to bring her back to her foster parents.  We finally got her back and (although she should have been knackered and ready for bed) she was in her element having Dad and Daddy and her foster mum and dad fussing over her.  Her foster family are having a farewell party for her tomorrow.  The emotions are so raw.  Although they are happy for her it is so clear to see how much they are going to miss her.  It's totes emotsh (Little One, I'll explain that to you in a few years time!)

It must be so confusing for Little One.  The people she has know and loved and the people she is learning to loved keep popping in and out of her life.  As we were leaving she said 'Daddies stay here!' with a sad look on her face.  We waved goodbye and said see you soon.  As the front door closed we heard her start crying.  Whilst it was horrible to hear her cry it is a good sign to know that she misses us.  Is that wrong???

We won't be seeing Little One tomorrow, it's quite a sad thought as we miss her so much already.

The good news is.......we might have her home a day earlier that originally thought!! God please!!!!

Introductions - Day 5

We had our Little One all to ourselves today.  Her foster carers dropped her of this morning and headed off for the day.  We all anticipated that there might be an issue as they left but fortunately for all concerned there was no such problems.

Within minutes Little One was tipping her room upside down again until she found the paint set.  The three of us sat down to paint, it was a very messy affair, but fun.  At times Little One was more interest in squeezing the paint out of the pot rather than using it.  When I finally wrestled it from her grasp we had a mini tantrum but lucky, so far at least, her tantrums last about 30 seconds! Get in!!!!

We then headed off to the pre-school Little One will be going to.  It didn't take her long to be happily playing along with the other children.  The only tricky moment we had was when the kiddies sat down for a story.  Little One would sit by herself so I sat with her.  Half way through though she got bored so headed off to find Daddy.  In the process she found a plate of cucumber which she loves and managed to munch her way through at least half a cucumber.

So we headed back home for lunch.  Little One didn't want to go back into her buggy.  We managed to strapped in despite a mini tantrum.  As soon as the belt was clipped and we were on our way the tantrum was over.  Daddy made lunch, Little One eat every last little bit.  Seriously, this all sounds too good to be true.

Little One's foster carers came back to collect and we discussed the day.  It's clear how much they are going to miss Little One when she comes to stay.  They love her so much.

Daddy and I headed off to Sainsbury's.  We would normally do our food shop on a Saturday but the prospect of shopping with Little One tomorrow was a little daunting so we decided to do it this evening instead.  It was a very different shop.  It was the first time we had to do a shop for three rather than two and was a totally different experience.  Next time we do it Little One will be in the trolley making her demands!!! What joy!!!

Introductions - Day 4

This morning the nerves were at fever pitch once again.  What was Little One going to think of her new home.

Daddy and I woke up far earlier than we needed to and after a trip to Sainsbury's for last minute essentials and a collection from the post office we had a quick tidy up and then waited nervously for our little arrival.

We live in a gated secure community (not sure whether it's the keep the riff raff out or keep us in!) and visitors need to be let in through the gate so when we the phone rang we knew they were outside.  We went to go a meet them and as Little One jump out of 'Baba's car' so was grinning widely and greeted us with a hug.

Once we were inside everyone's nerves (except Little One who didn't seem to have any) began to settle.  Little One was introduced to her new room and immediately began to rummage through all her new things.  The tidy room pulled apart in a matter of minutes.  At least she liked it!  'Come to my room' she'd say as she grabbed our hands and dragged us behind her.  We then had a trip to the museum which Little One decided acoustically was the perfect place to see how loud her voice was.

Then it was back home for lunch.  We had a few testing moments but that is to be expected and something we'll have learn to deal with.  All too soon it was time for Little One to go home.  We had a couple of tears as she was loaded into the car but we soothed them with a 'See you tomorrow' which she repeated with a smile.

Tomorrow she'll be here with us alone!!  Let's see what the day will be bring.

Introductions - Day 3

This morning was emotional! Daddy and I met Little One's paternal grandfather, we had no idea what to expect.  I supposed on the inside we didn't want to like or have any sympathy for him but when it came down to it this man was still grieving for the loss of his much loved granddaughter and still upset and hurt that his own flesh and blood wasn't strong enough to keep hold of her.  He spoke with love and passion and pain.  My heart was in my throat.  He loves Little One very much and we will make sure that she will always know that.

We arrived at Little One's foster home just before noon and found her watching her favourite, Mickey Mouse.  She was happy to see us and straight away involved us in her viewing pleasure.  She seems so comfortable with us now that it almost feels like we've known her a lot longer than we have.  Even her foster parents say that they are comforted by seeing how at ease she is with us.  Happy days!

The highlight of today has to be the bath and bed routine.  Little One couldn't wait to get into the bath.  She couldn't get her clothes of quick enough.  We had fun splashing about in the bath (obviously Daddy and I weren't in the bath).  I washed her hair as she played and grinned all the way through it.  She didn't even want to get out.  Daddy and I dried her off, got her into her jim-jams, oiled her lovely little ringlets and watched her run off giggling!  She is such a happy child.

That was until it came to dinner time.  Little One was quite tired by this point and refused to eat any of her food.  Daddy and I took the softly softly approach which clearly was never going to work.  It took foster dad to get her eating.  Lesson learned!

Bedtime was amazing.  We thought she'd never settle as she'd be to excited with us there.
At 7.30 on the dot we took her up for a wee, brushed her teeth and took her to her room.  We peeled back the covers and I placed her in her bed.  She didn't move.  I put the covers over her and tucked her in.  She still didn't move.  I kissed her goodnight and then Daddy kissed her goodnight.  She still didn't move.  We turned out the light and closed the bedroom door and that was it.  No tantrums, no calling out, no getting out of bed, no nothing!  If this is what the future holds we are going to be the luckiest parents in the world.

Tomorrow - Little One comes home for the first time (and meets the dog!)

Introductions - Day 2

We had an earlier start today and despite being held up in traffic we still managed to get there before Little One woke up.  My heart melted as we walked into her room and there she was, fast asleep.  We woke her and after a moments grump and then realising it was us, she gave us a smile.  Her first of the day.

We took her to the bathroom and assisted by her foster mother did the morning routine including dressing her for a day out with Dad and Daddy.  And then it was breakfast.  She like the same breakfast as her Dad.  Result!

Then we packed Little One into the car again and off we went to the soft play centre.  Little one had a blast playing in the balls and driving around in one of the three peddle cars that were available.  We almost had a situation when a young chap tried to wrestle her out of the car.  She wants having it and neither was Dad.  My first intervention when a boy is trying to take advantage of my daughter.  Watch out fellas!

We then went of for lunch, our first family restaurant lunch.  Little One was brilliant.  She coloured until her food came and then picked the bits she wanted and left the bits she didn't.  No fuss.  No drama.  Just a regular family lunch.

Once again it was time to head back to Little One's foster home, the end of day two and one step closer to having her home forever.  She seems so comfortable calling for her Daddy or for her Dad, sometimes I forget that she is calling me.

So roll on tomorrow, let's see what little gems Little One comes up with.

Introductions - Day 1

So it wasn't technically day one as we met Little one a couple of times in December and Skyped on Christmas Day but today was formally the first day of the introduction period.

We were up early this morning filled with anticipation and excitement.  When we arrived at her foster home Little One as a little shy at first but soon warmed up thanks to Mickey Mouse and Peppa Pig!

Our first parental task was getting Little one to use the loo as we were planning to head out on our first trip, just the three of us.  The first attempt proved fruitless, as did the second and the third.  Finally on the fourth attempt we had success.

After lunch, and with a fully packed backpack, we loaded Little One into her new car seat and headed off to the Discovery Play Centre.  After parking the car and strolling through the shopping centre on-route, I felt like the proudest man alive.  She was such a good girl.  And then when we finally arrived at the play centre, Little One exploded with excited as she played on all of the activities.  Her favourite was the slide, she like that a lot and squealed with delight as she came down it.  Even after the umpteenth time.

All too soon (for her that is) it was time to head home.  Her parting joy was wanting to ride all the escalators, the things that kids enjoy.  We finally arrived back at her foster home and Little One relayed the excitement of her day much to everyone's glee.

And then it was time to leave but Little One didn't want that.  If it was up to her we would have stayed longer and I must say, we were very tempted.

The best part of the day was being called Dad and Daddy.  Out of nowhere her little voice would shout out 'Come over here Dad'.  I couldn't help but grin.  I've always wanted to hear those words aimed at me.

So tomorrow is another day and one day closer to Little One being home for good.

New year, new journey!

So here we are in 2013 and our journey continues albeit on a slightly different road.

I've been off work this week, I decided to take a bit of holiday before my adoption leave starts.  In these few days I have turned into somewhat of a domestic god!  I have been cleaning and de-cluttering cupboards (I didn't think there was any clutter left, but I was wrong), finishing off the last few bits of DIY in Little One's room, doing loads of washing and generally trying to imagine my life as a stay at home dad.  I've got to the point where the slightest speck of anything on the kitchen surfaces has to be wiped away immediately.  I reckon that may soon change!

This coming weekend will be our final weekend as a couple, after that we'll be a family!!!

The formal beginning of the introduction period is on Monday at her current residence, we'll also go there on Tuesday and Wednesday but from Thursday onward she'll be coming here, to our home, to spend time with us.  I can't wait until Thursday and the first time that Little One will see her bedroom.  I really hope she likes it.   All being well she will be home for good a week on Tuesday and we will be a forever family!  I have a feeling there may be a few entries to this blog in the coming weeks.

So, not long to go till we get to the end of our current journey and begin our lifelong adventure.